Friday, July 31, 2009

The Dopest

Great cycling events tend to draw contestants and spectators like mosquitoes to free sample day at the Red Cross donation center. And so it was this year like the previous three years that the Tour de France and 24MOTAB attracted big crowds and riders all the while circling each other like hungry dogs in the alley behind the butcher shop. Errr, what? Okay, okay so 24MOTAB and the last day of the Tour fell on the same day again and 24MOTAB paid tribute by becoming 24Dope-TAB!

Pretty quiet on the doping front with the TdF this year so maybe MOTAB was a little off the back like some sad hipster that still thinks pirates are funny 4 years too late. But the difference is MOTABers are still there for the ride and the ride is what's important.

After the traditional pre-race press conference at Mickeys, the prologue to the abandoned building wound its way down the bike path. Skies had threatened rain all day but tonight it was clear and warm and the bike pile reached up to that cloudless blue expanse as if God himself might reach down and ring the bike bell on the uppermost handlebar. Whoops, got a little Phil Liggett on you there. Anyway, that jerk the KittenMaster nonchalantly knocked over the pile and the race was well and truly joined!

Riders became spectators, spectators became riders, hasty alliances were forged and shattered in the same lap and no one knew where off the front became off the back. But one thing was for certain, there was DOPE!

And who was the dopest of the dopers? Kenny took his first ever 24MOTAB victory home ensuring a place on next year's team and enough product endorsements to keep him in Cheetos till the end of next week! Last year's 24Dope-TAB winner Andrew was proof that cheaters/dopers can never acheive that level of dopeness again (or at least need to dope harder to pull it off a second time). Matt....Matt Matt Matt......DFL. And his choice of how to wear the DFL award only proved his worthiness of the DFL standing. Matt, that wasn't a Santa hat nosewarmer......

As the night sky closed in and the mosquitoes on their way home from the Red Cross decided to stop by for a snack, another edition of 24Dope-TAB was put down in the books. Next month a short return to normalcy for MOTAB but after that? Oh who knows after that.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

24 Dope-TAB the 4th!!!

This Sunday brings the 4th annual salute to the Tour de France and illicit drugs! It's been quiet on that front with the real tour so expect the 24MOTAB crew to take up the slack with plenty of EPO, blood transfusions and denials thereof!
Here's the trophy and all I can say is "heroic".

Slow Jamzzzzzzzzzzzz

Ugh, apologies for the lateness of this update on last month's 24MOTAB- too much kitten fur lodged in the computer caused a meltdown in the circuitry leaving the kittens and I isolated in a netless wasteland of normalcy.....whut?

June 28th's 24MOTAB was really one of the best ever and for a few accidental reasons as well as the planned ones. First of course it was the 24SLOWJAMs edition and Nils did a great 24 minute mix of Barry White, Al Green, R. Kelly, Marvin Gaye, Peabo Bryson and a few others (30 freaks in 24 minutes as Nils put it), so a nice laid back, mellow funkbomb for a Sunday evening. About 30 people showed up so we had this amazing precision built 9 foot plus bike pile balancing precariously in the wind. It did topple before anyone could stop it and when it did it toppled into this perfect rainbow shaped accordion (was wondering how we'd disassemble it if it managed to stay upright till the race started- question answered).

What we didn't know was that the fireworks at Warner Park had been moved from Saturday evening to Sunday due to a rain threat so because of the Abandoned Building's proximity to the Dane County Airport we got flyovers by 2 squadrons of Air National Guard helicopters and a squad of 4 F-111 fighter jets on their way to buzz Warner Park and display patriotism through massive firepower (nothing says America like guns n bombs!!! YEE-HAAWWW!!!). Apparently three MOTAB riders mooned the helicopters as they passed. Well done! That's some quick thinking on behalf of the counterculture! Then to balance things out a flock of mallard ducks flewover as well. First time riders were impressed by our connections with the military and mother nature I'd wager! Cory brought back assorted large fireworks from a trip to Tennessee he'd made including a 90 round Roman candle that went for about four minutes straight. Good thing the police were busy elsewhere directing traffic. Add to all that perfect temps, no mosquitos and the fact that it was the summer soltice and you couldn't ask for better. On the way out rounding the far end of Garver a yearling deer darted out in front of me running toward Olbrich. Inner city deer? Right on!